Showing posts from December, 2011

A Sad, Merry Christmas

Christmas is coming.
Usually that is said with more excitement and joy and less tears and foreboding.
 I remember hanging the decorations as we were setting up our Christmas tree last year and telling Sheldon, “Maybe next year we’ll have a baby!”
I became pregnant mere months after that hopeful statement.
And now Christmas is here. And I have a baby. A tiny baby girl with long fingers, big feet, dark brown eyes and a nose like mine. But she’s not here. My baby is a Heaven Dweller. She didn’t get a first Christmas. Sheldon and I have to figure out how to celebrate without her.
We made it through the Christmas shopping. We bravely made our way through stores that seemed to be filled with things specifically for little girls. We decorated. We bought an ornament for Rory. It doesn’t say Baby’s First Christmas. It says her name and it hangs on our tree. I did Christmas baking. Auntie Chelsey made a tiny cookie and dubbed it a Rory cookie. I kept it. It’s in my china cabinet.
We went t…

Well Then...

I was going to write a Pity Party Post about my newly discovered hiatal hernia and all the infininte joy it is bringing to my life, but I stumbled across a document I wrote at least a couple years ago whilst trying to organize the chaos that is "My Documents".

Here it is.

FAITH  I’ve been thinking a lot about faith lately. It seems to be popping up everywhere. The old hymn Trust and Obey is one that I haven’t heard sung in over a decade, yet that song is constantly running through my head. “Trust and Obey, for there’s no other way, to be happy in Jesus, but to Trust and Obey.”

My Bible study is going through the life of Job. He was a man of faith. His life that was once full and amazing was turned to a desolate waste. His children were killed, his wealth disintegrated. His health rapidly deteriorated, and his wife turned against him.

It wasn’t as if he didn’t acknowledge his life sucked. He knew it. He felt it. He wasn’t exactly thrilled about it. He never pretended to k…