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Showing posts from October, 2014

Happy Ending

I’ve started to plug back in at church. We’re going to a Sunday school class to become members. We are trying to attend more faithfully. I’m going to a Mom and Tots group. We’re planning on going to a married couple’s bible study. It’s encouraging. It’s scary. It’s lovely to feel connected. It’s exhausting. Sundays can so easily turn into “me” days. Into family days. Into rest (sleep in, stay in pj’s, cuddle on the couch) days. But I want my kids to grow up in church. I want church to be normal and necessary and an integral part of their lives. So I have to make it part of mine. I grew up in church. Up until I got pregnant with Rory I was quite active in church. And then my life was destroyed by the death of my daughter. Church became… uncomfortable. I didn’t want to talk to people. I didn’t want people to talk to me. What if they talked about Rory? Or worse… what if they never did? What was the point? I couldn’t worship. I couldn’t pray. The last thing on my mind was enriching my f…