Showing posts from August, 2015


11:45p.m. August 25, 2015
Dear Rory,
                In twenty minutes, four years ago, you came into this world. About this time I would have been strapped down in an ambulance, breathing through contractions, and wondering if we were going to make it to the hospital.
                We didn’t.
                I remember the moment you were born, in a wave of panic and fear, I pushed you out even though I was trying so hard not to. I remember taking big gulps of air, sobbing, praying you were alive. The paramedics and accompanying doctor were to the side, I couldn’t see you. One of them glanced at me and said, “We aren’t ignoring you, we are just taking care of the baby right now, hold tight.”
                I remember asking if you were alive, and the startled, concerned look the paramedic gave me with a quick affirmative reply. From the look on his face, he felt bad he hadn’t announced that fact. You were here, alive. Soon your cries confirmed it. They marveled that you had the …

August 5 - Doubly Blessed.

I remember lying on the ultrasound table, watching the screen. I saw words on that screen that made my heart skip a beat – or ten. Due date – August 26.                 August 26. My Heaven-dwelling daughter’s birthday. Rory’s birthday. I wasn’t happy at first. I was weirded out. Panicked, even. What did it mean? What were the odds? Why did it have to be the same day? Was I going to lose this baby, too?                 I was convinced the little one growing in my belly was a girl.  Right up until two days before I had my third baby, I was convinced. Sheldon and I were driving along to the city, when out of the blue I said, “Sheldon, it’s a boy. A boy. We have to come up with a boy name.”                 Sheldon thought I was crazy. But we did; we came up with two boy names we liked.                 I had done something rather silly a few weeks before. I had made it past 30 weeks gestation… and then 34… surpassing my previous pregnancies. Sheldon and I were looking a…